when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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