Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I am naked and annoyed.
Randomize
