are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
