hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
