One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
