do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
