I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Randomize
