Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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