I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize