Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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