So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
