just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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