idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize