the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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