Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I'm having to shit out rocks
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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