And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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