Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
