i just wanna soil my oats bro
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
