There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
