I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
