yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
