How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
