Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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