Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
