oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
