Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
