Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
