im drinking this country out of the recession.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
it's like iHOP with fire
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I think I sprained my soul last night
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
