you guys were way drunker than both of me
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
