Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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