why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
