To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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