lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
barbara walters just said penis...
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
