just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize