I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
