Porn is love you can see.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I love how my cats smell like pot.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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