take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
