I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Randomize
