I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Dicks are not precious.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
