her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize