East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
