i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Randomize
