I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize