People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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