oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
