I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
