Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I think your dad took our porno
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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