I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
