this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
