Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm like, not good at living.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
